Anne Beth Jordan: 'How I am changing old patterns and creating a new self'

My horoscope for January 2025.

Your stars this month are urging you to get your wellness regimes and routines in order. You have had a very tense few years with a lot of craziness to deal with. That must have left you feeling ragged. Use the energies this month to work out a timetable for the good of your health. And breathe.

As I read the above my shoulders were up by my ears and my breath was stuck somewhere deep in my stomach. The universe had spoken.

I had already decided at the beginning of January to clear my diary for three months, to hibernate and reassess the craziness of the past few years. I had begun to feel the physical effects of the last few years, the lack of energy, the lack of focus, the lack of drive, the lack of so much, and how my old reliance or patterns on my existence were creating negativity. I needed to recognise these, acknowledge them and change these patterns.

Grateful to have read this horoscope was an insufficient word.

So, for those of you feeling like my horoscope may align with you, I would like to offer five steps to help myself and you look at our old reliance and patterns and learn how we can change them without causing ourselves further anxiety and enhance wellbeing.

My future wellness reassessed

1. Reliance on being busy

My diary was always full, I needed to justify my daily life, to feel successful. What was this doing to my emotional and physical wellbeing?

What to do:

• Decide once a week to have a slow day and minimise your diary if clearing it completely is too difficult at this stage

• Sit in a café and read a book which has been lingering by your bedside for a long time

• Gather herbs from your garden or plant box and cook a new dish using these herbs, love your food

• Reach out to that craft hobby lying beside your sofa, wistfully looking at you – knitting, painting, hand sewing

Create a new purpose for this day by asking yourself – what is the most important takeaway for today that I need to focus on?

2. Reliance on being perfect

This has driven me crazy all my life, creating dynamics of inadequacies, jealousy, envy and the list is endless. I must be the best and of course, our media friends, magazines, social media LIKES. Well, where has this got me?

What to do:

• Believe that you are your own hero and that everything you do is just as it should be

• Remember every day you enact heroic qualities, write them down

• Comparison: There is no one that compares to you. You were born in perfection and continue to be your own perfect self. No one can ever take that away from you

• Look at yourself in the mirror and love what you see

Remember, create feelings of wellness by sharing a compliment, giving of yourself and acknowledging your imperfections and how they help you.

3. Reliance on others’ opinions

How much do you rely upon the experts to tell you how to be and live your life? I catch myself as I write this. Experts are great but the question to ask yourself is, why do I no longer trust myself? Why do I no longer listen to my wise inner self?

What to do:

• When you wake, wake slowly and meditate for 10 minutes. Sitting in bed, reflecting upon yourself

• Be with your thoughts in these moments and let your mind drift to the who and what of you and contemplate these thoughts

• Find moments and opportunities to remember how far you have travelled in your life, relying upon your intuition, your skills, your hard work, and your achievements, big or small

• You are an expert in your own life which you can share with others

Remember, listen to yourself and what works for you.

4. Reliance on my past

In the past, I felt successful, created business, innovative ideas and found it all too easy. Now, I feel stuck, unable to open my mind sufficiently to create a new way forward. My mental health is being affected by the lack of moving forward.

What to do:

• The past is the past and take from it the best and most loved times, moments, skills, and anecdotes, cherish them, glory in them and remember them as souvenirs of your life

• Visualise how you would like your new future to be. What do you want it to look like, feel like, smell like, taste like?

• Who do you want to be in this new future of yours? Can you see yourself and imagine this new way forward?

• Think of any old behaviours or patterns that you no longer want to shadow you in your new future. What qualities do you want to show the world today?

Remember, you can rewrite your own way forward.

5. Reliance on being liked

Are you a people pleaser, afraid to say no, afraid of being an outsider?

How stressful is it to be like this, hiding your true self and worth, knowing you have so much to offer? Now is the time to reframe this and tell yourself it matters not how much I need to be liked. I am strong.

What to do:

• Learn to create healthy boundaries and state what you want from others

• Learn to say No. What is the worst if you do? Shock, horror from friends and colleagues, even family. Give them a moment to get over it, they will

• What is the best that will happen? Take the time to reflect upon this

• What will happen when you do? Wait and watch what will happen

Remember, creating healthy boundaries will bring peace of mind, self-respect and healthier relationships with self and others!

Three key takeaways

• Prioritise self-care and slow down to boost emotional and physical wellbeing

• Embrace your uniqueness and avoid comparing yourself to others

• Cultivate self-trust and rely on your inner wisdom for guidance

Relevant resources

• How to plan for success

• How productivity cycles can boost business performance

• How to overcome impostor syndrome